Cut the Fat

a. Give your ideas no more words than they deserve.  The longer you take to say things, the weaker you come across and the more you risk blurring important ideas.

b. Economy requires the right attitude.  You must suspect wordiness in everything you write.  When you revise, tighten paragraphs to sentences, sentences to clauses, clauses to pharses, pharses to words, words to pictures, or strike the ideas entirely.  To be easy on your readers, you must be hard on yourself.  To help you hunt for wordiness, here are some common problems that are easy to spot and avoid.

Avoid "It is" and "There is"

No two words hurt naval writing more than it is.  They strecth sentences, delay meaning, hide responsibility, and encourage passive verbs.  Unless it refers to something mentioned earlier, avoid it is.  Spare only natural expressions such as "it is time to . . ." or "it is hard to . ." and an occasional pointing expression such as "it is your job to . . ." (not someone else's).

NOT                                            BUT
it is requested                               we request, 
                                                    please
it is my intention                            I intend
it is neccessary that you                you need to,  
                                                   you must
it is apparent that                          clearly
it is the recommendation               we recommed that

EXAMPLES:

It is mandatory that all active-duty personnel receive flu vaccinations.

All active-duty personnel must receive flu vaccinations.


b.  Like it is constructions, forms of there is make sentences start slowly.  Don't write these delayers without first trying to avoid them:

There will be a meeting of the Human Relations Council at 1000 on 26 July in the main conference room.

The Human Relations Council will meet at 1000 on 26 July in the main conference room.

Article Reference:
SECNAVINST 5216.5